I have just counted, and there are 14 "hi" messages from the past week. Dear god.
Anyway, on to the creepers. First, one aged 30 who I'd exchanged about 4 messages with two weeks or so prior to this.
Him: Add me on whatsapp. Im very busy and hardly ever get on here x (see my rant on strangers who use Xs if you haven't already)
Me: I don't have whatsapp- probably a good idea to ask in future. I don't add strangers anyway, especially those who put kisses on their messages. That creeps me out. If you want to talk on here that's fine but I'm not adding you anywhere else.
Him: oh dear... you sound annoying. Yes, probably best if we don't bother.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Please note that he was the one who originally messaged me and seemed interested. Ah well, I feel I'm not missing much!
Creeper #2: A 29 year old man who cannot spell to the level of a six year old.
Him: if ur partner had tied u to the bed, blindfolded u n put ur knickers in ur mouth then spent the afternoon doing watever they wanted to you n u wer hot n wet thn they wispered in ur ear now the ad i put up online has had so many replies soon the door bell will be ringin n then u will b entertaining whoever i let in ... wat wud u do? (does he seriously expect a positive response? I think I strained my eyes with the amount of time I spent staring at this message, willing it to form into words... Also, I think this might be called rape)
Me: Ask them not to omit vowels and punctuation?
Him: i guess thtd kill a fire
Me: No idea on that one. I don't do random role-plays with people I don't know, anyway.
Him: even in yur thinkin mind?
Me: How would I do a role-play in my mind? Surely that's just thinking?
Him: I suppose it is. It would not werk in reality as i already told u the whole thing.. or did i
Me: I'm guessing the rest is just about your little fantasy slave getting fucked by several men. From what I could decipher, that's where it was headed.
Him: It depends if any women answere the ad but i left it up to u
mayb it is just to see what wud happen
Me: The ad? I'm sorry, was your story meant to be an ad for something?
Him: fer yer pussy (I almost choked laughing here)
Me: Uh-huh. Well, mine responds to intelligence and well-thought-out messages, so I'm afraid yours failed.
He stopped making sense after this, if you can call this sense. He amused me.
Creeper #3: 31 year old married man, who was surprisingly polite in rejection. I do not respect cheaters, but it's none of my business. Usually these copypaste messagers are quite rude when rejected, but he was polite, so that's points to him. His message title was "a stunning attraction". I know it, babes.
Him: Hi, i am from the norwich area, have to say you have an amazing body and such an innocent look that it's so much more exciting to find out how naugty you can be! :)
i am 31 years old :( but look younger than i am....29 maybe? :)
i am a cheeky explorer but also very respectful!
i am also naughty, perhaps naughtier than you'd like...i am married....i know thats bad, my wife does not know about my naughty desires......would you be willing to chat and perhaps move things to a physical and fun nature?
i appreciate i don't have any pics on here, obviously it's due to the fact i shouldnt be on here according to my wife!
i've never messaged on here....lets see how this goes...lol
i will understand though if you'd rather i do one! lol (why do people think it's acceptable to put "lol" in lower case letters, and in real conversation? Teenager is not happy!)
Me: Sorry but you're outside of my age range and I don't agree with nonconsensual non-monogamy (i.e. cheating). I'd suggest you talk to your wife and sort out the issues therein before being on here, and that you perhaps choose people within your age group.
Him: I appreciate your reply and honesty, and half expected both those responses.
All the best and am sure you will find what you want on here with more suitable folk :)
I'm glad that he was polite. I do not respect him because of the cheating and the obvious copypaste, but at least he's not one of those who begs for sex, then calls you a fat ugly whore when you say no (this has happened and I find it hilarious). Still, the fact that he calls himself "naughty" as a 31 year old man on a kink site is funny. So many people think they're so kinky and naughty, when their most daring fantasy is perhaps anal or outdoor sex. Good for them, you know, that's cool, but it's clear that they haven't been on FetLife long. You'd have to go far to shock someone on there! Anyway, enough creepers for now. The "hi" guy has just messaged me again. Oh dear!
